Three Seatbelt Stories

Derrill's story:

We don't really have seatbelts in Nigeria. They exist in the cars, mostly, but have been scrunched under the bucket seats so you can't get at them. I've been in only 2 maybe 3 cars where the seatbelts worked and were available.

As someone who grew up after seatbelt laws in the US made them mandatory, I have been conditioned to believe they are necessary, wonderful, life-saving inventions that are absolutely crucial. Especially for children.

How do I deal with the cognitive dissonance this sets up? Mostly by pretending I'm one of those rebellious, aging hipsters from my youth who like to ride motorcycles without a helmet [see left] and claim seatbelt laws are a tremendous infringement on my civil liberties. Nigeria has freed me.

When I come back to the States, I smirk and say, "Seatbelts. How quaint." I then gratefully imprison myself and my children in the comfort of the familiar.

Prince's story:

Prince loves to race. His favorite race involves racing to see who can buckle their seatbelt fastest. He did it ALL the TIME last summer.

For some reason, when we came back to the States this winter, he had forgotten how to buckle his seatbelt. He just couldn't do it. 

We're accustomed to this normal 4 year old behavior of learned incompetence and we generally have very little patience with it, which is also normal for 4 year old parents. On our way back from the library, Joy gave him an ultimatum: get your seatbelt buckled or you and I are walking home.

That got him to genuinely try again, but the seatbelt still eluded him. I had him get out of his seat and try buckling the belt while looking at it. 

He couldn't. We moved his booster seat (how quaint!) to the far back of my parents' minivan.

He couldn't. Then I remembered how we had the car arranged in the summer [see picture]. I had him move his booster seat to the other side of the car.

He snapped the belt right in. It was a handedness issue. He can only buckle his seatbealt from left to right.

The races are back on!

Princess's story:

Princess loves her brother. When he and I agree to do a seatbelt race, it's often a race to see if he can buckle himself in faster than I can buckle Princess into her car seat. (Infant car seats. How quaint!)  Because of this, Prince usually wins and calls out, "First!"

This morning Prince was still finding his church shoes when I took Princess out to the car. I buckled her in. She looked around the empty car and called out, "Fuhst. Fuhst. Fuhst."

Best Disney Animated Villains

Behold, another awe-inspiring table!

After my post about Disney's animated animal sidekicks, the idea that most attracted me was doing my own villains list. I know, I know, I lose a lot of hipster cred doing something so totally mainstream ;)  I still think it is an interesting exercise trying to quantify WHY certain villains stand out. Descriptions below the break, and as always I am open to discussion, improvements, and filling in gaps for movies I don't remember well enough.

It turns out that 2 villains stand out far and above the rest, with 7 more also notably triumphing (>65 points) over other, mediocre villains (35-51). At the bottom, 5 fell far short of the others (<30)

Top Two (tied at 84/90)


Other villains who scored at least 65


Are you as surprised as I am that every one of the Top 10 either wears a black hat or has pointy hair? I will also point out that Jafar, Scar, Prince John, and Gov. Ratcliffe sport evil goatees, while Hook, Shan Yu, and Merlock have evil pointy mustaches. It is rumored that Ursula has a faint, evil mustache as well, but that they photoshopped it out at her request.

Updated: Added Ending

	Cunn	Str	Evil	Plan	Song	Able	Hench	Actor	End	DW	Sum	Chron
Ursula	8	10	10	8	10	10	8	2	8	10	84	14
Jafar	10	10	9	10	4	9	10	2	10	10	84	18
Dr. Facilier	8	6	10	5	10	7	8		10	10	74	33
Prof. Rattigan	10	6	10	10	6	10	4	5	5	5	71	12
Claude Frollo	10	8	8	2	10	7	6		10	10	71	22
Judge Doom	10	7	10	8	0	10	4	5	8	6	68	13
Syndrome	8	10	9	8	0	7	10		5	10	67	29
Scar	10	6	10	8	6	5	2	3	8	8	66	19
Maleficent	2	10	10	7	0	10	10		8	8	65	6
Captain James Hook	8	7	9	6	0	2	8	2	4	10	56	5
Lots-O'-Huggin Bear	10	0	7	4	0	10	8		4	6	49	35
Percival C. McLeach	8	4	7	2	0	8	6	5	5	4	49	16
Gothel	8	0	7	4	10	7	0		7	6	49	34
Charles Muntz	10	4	7	0	0	6	10	3	2	6	48	32
Shan Yu	3	9	10	2	0	10	10		2	2	48	24
Randall Boggs	8	8	7	7	0	5	0		5	6	46	28
Hopper	0	6	7	2	0	8	10	3	5	4	45	25
Merlock (Ducktales)	4	10	9	4	0	6	0	5	2	2	42	15
Queen Grimhilde (SW)	6	6	6	4	0	6	6		2	6	42	1
Prince John	2	8	4	2	0	0	6	5	5	6	38	9
Red Queen	0	8	7	0	0	4	8		8	2	37	4
Gaston	4	4	6	2	4	4	8		2	2	36	17
Shere Khan	4	9	7	0	0	8	0		4	4	36	8
Gov Ratcliffe	2	6	5	0	4	2	8	3	4	2	36	20
Stinky Pete	7	2	2	2	0	5	0	5	4	8	35	27
Lady Tremaine	6	2	6	0	0	6	4		4	4	32	3
Chef Skinner	2	2	1	0	0	2	4	3	10	4	28	30
Cruella de Vil	2	0	5	2	2	2	4		5	0	22	7
Madame Medusa	0	2	6	4	0	2	4		3	0	21	10
Brer Fox	4	0	3	2	0	0	2		6	4	21	2
Sid Phillips	0	0	10	0	0	2	0		8	0	20	21

5 most pitiful Disney villains. Let's face it, they were overthrown by mice, dogs, and a bunny. Not supervillain material.

Visions of Sugar Plums

Merry Christmas

We are enjoying our time in Goleta with my family. My health situation is apparently much better than advertised. The kids are loving being with their grandparents. Merry Christmas one and all.

How can you tell when your preschooler is listening?

Prince opening a gift from me:
a set of Mario styli for the Wii.
He wanted to make sure that we packed
all the toys where he had placed one.
I think it was a winner.

I told Prince a story this morning. It wasn't original to me by any means. It was the story of two sons who were asked by their father to do something. One son said "Sure, Dad" and then didn't do anything. The other said "No," but later repented and did what his father asked. We talked about the story and how it related to his life.

A few hours later, he told Mommy and me a story of his own. "Remember that story you told me today, Dad? It's exactly the same as in my Mario movie!"

There are very few real Mario movies. So Prince invents more adventures for Mario and friends and calls them movies. I was rather surprised to learn he had already heard it and acted it out, but Joy added that this was a new movie he created this morning.

Prince explained there were three friends: Mario, Luigi, and Peach. They were asked to do something. Peach said she would, but didn't. Luigi said he wouldn't, but then repented and did it. But Mario - ever the perfect example - said he would do it and he did it. He wants to be like Mario.

Not a baby

I'm trying to convince my daughter that she is not a baby.

I ask her what my name is and my name is Daddy. She knows Mommy. She knows Prince's real name. But when I ask her her name, she thinks it's Baby.

I'm not worried about any behavior I'm trying to correct, per se. I just want her to see herself as a growing young woman. Joy says she does not have a problem with her being a baby.



She is not yet 18 months, but today she demonstrated she can count to 10.
She is not yet 18 months, but she can sing the entire Looooong-form alphabet song from Love Those Letters. She knows her alphabet.
She has started singing along with the hymns. Surprised us this week and last - and look at that great mouth shape!
She can communicate and learns new words every day.
She walks 99.44% of the time...
She is independent and decisive, knows her mind.
"She is starting to listen and follow directions."
Today, I told her to "Go" out of our room. She obeyed, and then told me to "Come" with her.

This is not a baby. The hard part has been that ... I need to stop calling her Baby first.

This week for the first time, I got her to say her nickname. She can't manage her full name yet - too many syllables, but she did come up with her nickname twice. 

Best Disney Animal Sidekicks

Behold, an amazing table!

A friend had on her blog a countdown of the most annoying Disney characters ever. I decided to go about it more social-scientifically and put numbers on things. There are far too many characters to do them all at once. So this is my ranking of Disney's best animated animal sidekicks. All the descriptions and caveats and all the rest are below the fold.

(Updated 12/7 - fixed chronology, added Max, Pip, and Kevin, rescored Little Mermaid Talking on my brother's advice.)
My Top 5 (tie for 5th)

Movie	Character	Talk	Int.	Plot	Comfort	Comedy	Music	Prince	My Pref	Total	Time
Pinocchio	Jiminy Cricket	10	10	10	8	4	8	10	10	70	1
Jungle Book	Baloo	10	8	8	10	6	8	6	10	66	3
Little Mermaid	Sabastian	8	10	8	5	6	10	8	10	65	4
Tangled	Pascal	6	10	6	10	8	0	6	10	56	14
Aladdin	Iago	10	10	8	8	10	2	0	4	52	5
Enchanted	Pip	9	10	6	5	7	4	4	7	52	11
Brother Bear	Koda	8	6	10	8	2	0	8	5	47	10
Up	Doug	10	3	8	4	10	0	6	6	47	12
Aladdin	Abu	6	4	6	8	6	0	6	10	46	5
Little Mermaid	Scuttle	8	6	2	4	8	4	6	6	44	4
Princess & Frog	Ray	8	6	6	6	2	8	6	2	44	13
Brave	Mother	4	8	10	6	2	0	6	8	44	15
Cinderella	Jacques & Gus	4	6	6	0	8	4	8	6	42	2
Princess & Frog	Louis	8	8	2	0	4	6	6	7	41	13
Tarzan	Tantor	8	8	4	6	4	0	6	4	40	9
Little Mermaid	Flotsam & Jetsam	8	8	6	8	0	0	0	8	38	4
Up	Kevin (fem)	2	4	10	4	5	0	4	4	33	12
Little Mermaid	Flounder	8	6	2	6	2	0	4	2	30	4
Tangled	Maximus	4	8	7	0	6	0	4	0	29	14
Cinderella	Lucifer	2	4	4	4	4	0	0	9	27	2
Mulan	Lucky Cricket	4	4	4	0	6	0	4	4	26	8
Tarzan	Terk	8	6	4	4	2	0	2	-2	24	9
Little Mermaid	Max	2	2	0	4	2	0	4	6	20	4
Aladdin	Raja	4	2	0	2	0	0	4	6	18	5
Hunchback	Djali (goat)	2	2	0	0	2	0	4	0	10	7
Pocahontas	Meeko et al	2	2	0	0	2	0	2	0	8	6

Bottom 5 I think we could do without.

Nothing against Raja or Max, really - they got 6/10 just based on whether I like them or not. They just doesn't serve a purpose. What the table tells me is that none of these on the bottom do.

I was really surprised how high Koda came out and that Iago beat Abu. I was rooting for Abu to be in the top 5, but he's the only one I gave a 10 to that didn't make it.

I was also surprised how very few females there are on the list. Merida's mom (and you can argue she doesn't belong on the list for several reasons), and maybe Cri-Kee and Djali - I'm not sure and I'm not checking. Even the female leads don't have female sidekicks! Weirdness. [This convinced me to add Kevin from Up, even though her status as a proper sidekick may be questionable]

So there you have my take on Disney's animated animal sidekicks. Of course, now that I've given this way too much thought over the last two evenings, I'm starting to wonder what other groups of Disney characters I should rank and how. Villains? All the sidekicks I didn't include this time around? Human sidekicks? Leads? Any requests?

Again, full description and the wonkishness below the fold.

Christmas a little early

Because we're flying back to California next week, we decided to have a little Christmas this morning. We read Luke 2, acting out the parts with various stuffed critters. I was quite proud of my casting: Caesar as an eagle; the shepherds as the Backyardigans, the first angel as Sorcerer Mickey and then the multitude of heavenly host as a GIANT Mickey. Prince and Princess served as the parents in the Holy Family. Here is Princess adoring baby Jesus.

More pics below the fold

My Son, the Trickster

I try to read to Prince every night. We usually start whenever he's ready for bed and end at 7:30. This encourages him to be prompt in getting ready for bed.

Often if he is close to 7:30, but just a tiny bit over, I'll offer to read to him for 1-2 minutes "just because I love you."

A short while back, he was getting to bed rather late and it was not his fault. He asked for story and I told him no, it was much too late. He asked if I would read to him just because I love him. Well, I set myself up good for that one, didn't I?

Seeing my hesitation, Prince offered a compromise: "You could read me just one word, Daddy. Pleeeeeeease."

Oh, all right. Just one word. The. Good night.

The next night he was late to bed again. He asked for two words this time. I agreed. Two pirates. Good night.

He very happily told Mommy about "The two pirates" the next morning and she looked at me like she knew I'd been had.

He's been pretty good about getting to bed anyway since then, but tonight he was asking for "just 6 words" and I turned him down. As I sit back here smiling, I wait for the day he offers to let me read him just one word today, two words the next day, four words the next day, eight words the next, and so on.

Princess' Royal Throne

Princess has taken to giving us a warning the last few weeks.

Sometimes she says, "Go. Go." Where do you want to go? "Potty."
Sometimes she is more direct. "Poo."

When we take her to the toilet, we take off her diaper and then she climbs up onto the toilet by herself. Sitting there, she scrunches her face and says, "Push!"
It's adorable.

This Friday, Princess told Joy, "Pee Poo."
Joy took her to the bathroom and got her ready. She climbed up on the throne, sat, and added to the water below. Mommy cheered. Prince cheered. Mommy texted me and I rejoiced too.

All by herself. We haven't coached her in the slightest.

Aftermath of the Adventures and more Thanksgiving

Thursday afternoon I got an email from the National Hospital with my diagnosis: a herniated disc. Happy Thanksgiving! Brother-in-law DeWayne the doctor called me from Boston to discuss what it all meant and options. Friday I finally cornered the AUN Clinic doctor who agreed: Derrill needs an operation and it shouldn't be done here. He also gave me a new prescription for an NSAID that actually works. I've been mostly pain-free since and have enjoyed and relished lack of pain.

Thursday we also had a Thanksgiving dinner with the AUN community. The kids had a great time. 

Friday evening I attended a dinner for our illustrious keynote speaker, the former head of the Central Bank and key financial adviser (left). Next to him is AUN's Founder, the former vice president - that  week is also his birthday so we celebrate Founder's Day most of the weekend. Next to him is the Chairman of the Board.

Near me (not pictured) was the Adamawa Peace Council, an initiative AUN has helped spearhead to reduce violence in the area, and several members of the US Embassy. From AUN were ... the economists. I think originally the idea was for a quiet dinner with the economists [two of them behind the chairman], AUN's President (an economist) and the keynote speaker (an economist), but somewhere along the line a few more guests and then a few more were invited.

At dinner, Pres. Ensign and I talked very briefly about the possibility of sending me, not to Switzerland or Tulane, but to UCLA for my surgery. In emails since then, Joy and I found a doctor on the insurance in Santa Barbara and our travel has been approved to have the surgery done at home! So ...

We'll be home for Christmas!

Further Adventures in Medicine - II

Wednesday (21st) I woke up and was immediately grateful. I was grateful that I was not in terrible pain. I could walk and was just fine. I headed off to the hospital, made my way to the MRI, and showed them my N100,000. Now how about some service? "Well, where's your green [registration] card?" I still don't have one. Did the doctor not prepare anything?

One of them kindly walked me around the hospital gathering the various pieces of paperwork I needed, steering me through lines (and sometimes around them), arguing with the officials on my behalf, until I finally had the paperwork done 45 minutes later. Actually, since I only thought I needed the N100,000 for the MRI I had very little other cash on hand. When registration cost N1,500 I had to borrow N1000 from him. I paid him back once we returned to my backpack, but he really helped me through and was very nice.