A childhood trauma, fondly remembered

I originally wrote this post in 2010 on our other blog, but something I read online reminded me of it and I wanted to share it again. Because it's funny.

Kids normally go through a stage of babbling random consonants as they practice sounds. Over time, these babblings start to sound like words. Then they become words. We've been trying to figure out this one sound Superstar [then 21 months old] LOVES making. What could he possibly be saying? We haven't agonized over it, but it has occasionally given his father some consternation.

Joy figured it out last night and as she told me, I leaned my head against our coat racks and relived an event from a couple decades ago..... (wavy flashback effect)

Ants have preferences

An ant colony is entering our house through a crack under our dining room table that I haven't been able to eradicate yet. This has given us a great incentive to keep the table and the floor under it really clean. We don't always succeed, though, and our mishaps have occasionally taught me some interesting things about ants and their ability to express their preferences.

I learned that ants have preferred foods and that they will completely ignore other foods if they have a more-preferred option available. For each of the following pairs, pick which one you think our ants attacked: (answers below the fold)

Cherries or grapes?
Bananas or bread crumbs?
Water used to heat frozen vegetables or flat, sugared cream soda (from Dublin)?

Thursday Throwback - Balboa Park 2

I was so sad when I realized the CD with half of Aunt Jacquie's photos of us at Balboa Park for our wedding was broken. Imagine my joy, then, (pun intentional) when I discovered we had TWO copies of each CD, and the replacement copy works! Here are some more favorite pictures from the day before Joy and I were sealed.

Throwback Thursday - Family pictures after the wedding

May 28, 2005

Our triumphal exit from the temple.

So, funny little story about our least-favorite part of the day: In a wedding at an LDS temple, you don't need a tux or any of the usual worldly finery, so I wore my temple clothing for the wedding. After the ceremony, I went to change and only then realized I'd left the tux in the car. We sent my brother to find it (after he got changed). He got lost, I think. Dad went to find him. It took a while. Eventually they found me again and I got dressed and came out to find Joy.

She meanwhile had been waiting for me. Really brand-newly married and her husband was nowhere to be found! For more than half an hour! It was very disconcerting. When I finally emerged, one of the temple workers had her hide and made me spend some time waiting on her. "That's the way things are supposed to be! The man waiting on the woman!" So I waited in a side room until we could be rejoined. It really was her least-favorite part of the wedding day. So when we emerged from a side door to find our families waiting (patiently) on the two of us, it was truly a moment of triumph. Let the wild rumpus start!

In the 13 years since, I can say I spend very little time waiting on Joy to get ready. I am a blessed man, in many ways.


The rest of the pictures are of our family. I'm labeling everyone for family history purposes

Throwback Thursday - Balboa Park

The other day we very nearly lost our family computer - the one with all the pictures we've saved up for forever. I realized that, while I used to be diligent about backing things up, the advent of cloud computing and transferring every file to the next computer had made me lazy. As I'm going back, restoring old pictures to the current computer so I can put them on more modern devices, I know I want to preserve some pictures.

Joy's Aunt Jacquie flew out to San Diego with us to take pictures the day before our wedding (and the day of) at beautiful Balboa Park. Cousin Rich also took pictures of the wedding and the Utah reception. Those pictures and two filled photo albums were among our most treasured wedding gifts. Here are some of our favorites from Balboa Park. (Sadly, half of the CDs of pictures they gave us have corrupted since. I'll need to scan our wedding album book sometime.)

Someone had a birthday last month...ish - Princess

In keeping with my tradition this year of blogging everyone's birthdays a month late, here is Princess' 7th birthday.

She decorated her own cake (and at least she helped make it; she might have made it herself too, but I'm not 100% sure and she's in UT right now so I can't ask). Her birthday theme was Under the Sea, following her school's musical program.

We celebrated several days. Day 1 was with my parents while they were in town visiting us. She opened her presents from them and we all enjoyed cake and ice cream. We ate a lot of pizza and tried to figure out just how far her walkie talkies would reach (answer: not as far as the pizza place).

She got soft and fuzzy things mostly.

Also a couple games and a bunch of really noisy dress-up shoes.

Princess has taken to origami lately, so she made her own party hats. Pop is a good sport.

She didn't get quite enough made for everyone, so we pulled out some hats from last year. Superstar is also a good sport, as long as you know he is a Prince, not a Princess.

The next day was her normal birthday and we gave her our gifts (more soft and fuzzy things, mostly) plus some books and a tracing tablet for our artistic girl. One of the fun things was her pausing opening her gifts to start reading each of the books she got.

Then she had a few friends over for a party. They played in the kiddie pool and enjoyed some games. She tried to teach them a little origami.

She was a very happy little seven year old, but she did one thing I wish she hadn't ... she started looking older and more grown up. Your kids aren't supposed to get older! Sigh.

Jolly Old King Benjamin

In 2005 I came up with the following parody of "Jolly Old Saint Nicholas," using the teachings of King Benjamin from Mosiah chapters 2-4 in the Book of Mormon.

Jolly old King Benjamin said: “Pitch your tents this way.

Don’t you trifle with the words that I’m going to say.

Jesus Christ is coming soon, so my countrymen,

Choose this day whom you will serve and be born again.

“I have served my whole life through that you might be taught:

When you serve your fellow man, alone then you serve God.

And if I, your chosen king, have labored to serve you,

Ought ye not to do the same: serve each other too?

“Oh what thanks we all should give to our Heavn’ly King!

Though we serve Him, we are just unprofitable things.

First off, He created us.  We are in His debt.

Then we serve, He blesses us, and we aren’t out yet.

“When the clock was striking twelve, I was fast asleep.

There appeared an angel bright, and my heart did leap.

He gave me a message clear, and I know ‘tis true:

Jesus is the only way salvation comes to you.

“We must be little kids, and be easily taught;

For you know the nat’ral man’s an enemy to God.

Yield unto the Holy Ghost, put off the nat’ral man,

Trust in God, be humble too; with His help you can.

“If you’ve felt to sing the song of redeeming love

Keep in mind how great and wise is the Lord above,

Then, my friends, you will retain remission of your sin

And you will teach holy things to your children.

“Last of all, please watch yourselves, your thoughts and words and deeds.

Do not let your brothers beg – answer all their needs.

See that ye do all these things in order and wisdom,

Then one day you will return to God’s great kingdom.”

More traveling (and hospitalizations) than expected

As summer approached, we asked Superstar what he wanted to do this summer. His answer was firm and clear: NOT go ANYwhere. Let's stay at home this summer and just read and play.

Sorry, kid.

This post is a rehash of the trips we've taken and some of the health problems this summer plus some gratuitous pictures of the kids because we always need more of them.

End of May/early June I went to Atlanta for a conference.

I was still on my way back when we learned Joy's mother had a stroke (she hadn't, but that was the report we got) and was unresponsive, so she left the kids with a friend and started driving to UT. My dad called and used some flyer miles to get her a flight instead, which saved a good deal of time and trouble. I got back and watched the kids for a week while she nursed her mother back to health. Turns out it wasn't a stroke and she was soon mended.

Superstar the Archer, who has 2
healthy arms again and knows
how to use them!

The next week was Scout Camp, with Joy and Superstar enjoying 96 degrees and high humidity all day. That was the week the central air broke and we had to have it replaced.

The next week we all stayed home and let my parents come visit us (Yay, grandparents!) after my brother graduated with his PhD in Hispanic Languages and Literature. Yay, Steve! They got to stay for Princess' birthday. Yay, Princess! And I totally need to blog about that.

As soon as they left, I drove JT up to Cook's child hospital. He has been gagging most every day for years and the docs can't figure out what's wrong. So we had a probe inserted through his nose to measure the ph in his stomach. It had to stay in for 24 hours. He had really been looking forward to his "noodle nose", but didn't like it nearly as much once he had it. Turns out his (very mild) food allergies might be harming something in his intestines. He is now on a dairy-free diet to see if it's a milk allergy, but so far nothing has changed. We'll be trying dairy-free for 2 months and then see about removing something else from his diet.

A few days later we left on our two week drive to CO, UT, WA, and CA, which I do promise will get a blog or three sometime. While we were gone, four of us came down with a bad stomach flu - we suspect we had two different stomach viruses because some us ******************* while the others had **********. I did both. Lost 5 pounds, though, and I've kept them off, so that was nice. Horrible pain. We gave it to my parents. :(  Sorry, Pop and Grandma!

She asked me to please help
her look as sad as possible

I got a happier shot
once she had her pink cast

The next week we were with our friends in Louisiana, where Princess broke her arm. :(  She was jumping on the furniture upstairs (we adults were all downstairs) and fell on her arm. Some of her first coherent words were, "Now I understand why you keep telling me not to jump on the furniture." Yyyyyup. She has a pretty pink cast now.

And no sooner have we returned, but we learn that Joy's mother is in a real bad way and has been sent to the hospital twice in one week. We now realize this is not just a one-off, but a longer-term issue. So Joy grabbed the two younger kids and drove to UT to spend some time with her mom and plan with her brothers and sister what they will do for her long term. She may be up there a week; it may be a month or more.

Superstar the Beach Boy

Superstar and I are chillin' at home while I finish preparing my tenure packet, try to get a research paper out before school starts, and prepare for teaching seminary and an overload (one class more than I usually get assigned). The plan is that, at latest, Joy will come back with the kids around the start of school/my birthday and then drop of Princess with me while she and JT return to UT again if things haven't been resolved yet.

So, sorry, Superstar, but it looks like we had some traveling happening every single week this summer. And this week? This week I'm getting a minor surgery for my ankle. That should keep the two of us home at least!

Our family photo the morning Joy left, 5:30am

Games new and old, and the pain they cause

Joy has a new etymological theory: "John-Thomas was just trying to put on his socks and said, 'I'm not a very good socker.' I think that's where they got the name Soccer from! From those very long socks they wear!"

------

I challenged Superstar to make some of our games for smaller children more interesting: combine 2 or more into a new game. His first attempt was interesting. We're debating still on the exact name. Maybe "My Great Uncle Yahtzmuti". At any rate, it's a combination of The Great Dalmuti, Yahtzee, and Uncle Wiggly.

1 - Play a trick of Dalmuti.
2 - Whoever takes the trick gets to take a turn at Yahtzee.
3 - If they score >0 in Yahtzee, then they get to move their Uncle Wiggly piece a number of spaces indicated by their Yahtzee roll. No matter what or how they score in Yahtzee, the Great Dalmuti adds up all 5 dice, the Lesser Dalmuti 4 dice, merchants and the lesser peon 3, and the greater peon 2. (So if you got a full Yahtzee and scored 50 based on a roll of five ones, the greater peon would still move only 2 spaces.) Note: You get to choose which dice (as long as you aren't the Great Dalmuti) so you can often avoid landing on bad spaces by taking a larger or smaller die roll.
Repeat until you decide you are done.

If your Uncle Wiggly makes it to the doctor before the game is finished, any extra steps he takes are added to your Yahtzee score. When someone gets to the doctor, the game is over. Add your Wiggley spaces to your Yahtzee score, and whoever has the highest total wins.

--------

Pioneer Day singing

At the ward Pioneer Day party there was a slip and slide activity. Most of the kids were lined up for it, and I stood watching and longing. It's been a Long time since I got to do that. As I thought about it, I felt very sure that if I did it, I was going to get hurt, probably land on and bruise my ribs somehow.

(Pssst, Derrill! That's a sign you are OLD!) 
Thanks, I know.

I decided to do it anyway. I ran, jumped, and slid delightedly all the way to the end. The hot day was not nearly so unbearable anymore, I got some amused looks from the more adult adults, and my prophecy was 100% confirmed. I bruised a rib on my right side and have been getting twinges of pain since. Every time it flares up because I'm stretching too far, I try to think about how fun that dive and slide was and enjoy it all over again.

I'm not dead yet.

PS for my mother - I needed a chest x-ray for some reason before my ankle surgery, so that happened the next morning, and because of that I know I didn't crack the rib. I'm okay. No worries.

At that same activity, some of the youth and kids lay in wait to soak the bishop. He took a while coming out, though, so they used up most of their water on each other first. Despite that, here is a short video of his reception:

Conversations with JT - Incredibles 2

Last week little JT started pointing finger guns at people (which is against house rules - no shooting people) and saying "Pew pew." He shot everybody. A lot. A little concerned, I pulled him aside for an interview.

D: Why are you shooting people?
JT: "To stop bad guys."
D: There are no bad guys here. And who do you know who stops bad guys with guns?
JT: "Super heroes."
D: JT, the superheroes don't use guns. Superman doesn't use a gun. Wonder Woman doesn't use a gun. Batman doesn't use a gun [in most of his incarnations]. Green Lantern doesn't use a gun [except in his day job in the military, I guess.] The X-Men don't use guns. The Avengers don't use guns [Good thing he doesn't know about Iron Man. Or Cap's day job. I would probably lose this argument if he knew anything.] Who uses guns?
JT: "The Incredibles."
D: What? Mr. Incredible doesn't use a gun. Mrs. Incredible doesn't use a gun. Frozone doesn't use a gun. Dash doesn't use a gun. Violet doesn't use a gun. Jack ... ... ... -Jack...


"Pew-pew. Pew-pew"

[Riiiiiight. We just saw Incredibles 2 with Pop and Grandma.] So you're Jack-Jack?
"Yes! I am. I shoot fire and ice."
Okay, well, JT, Jack-Jack doesn't shoot a gun. He shoots from his eyes. Will you please shoot your fire and ice from your eyes instead?
"YES!"
[We practiced that a little. Another crisis averted thanks to ... LISTENING!]


This morning JT says
"I can run really fast like Dash. I have a Super Mario hat that can make you speed up real fast. At super limit, and then super speed. I cannot have glasses with them, but fight because I'm trying to defeat a bad guy so there is no any bad guys left. Then my friends can just live with me, but I have to not let them run away from me because they all really disappear and they get in their homes."

What was your favorite part of the movie?
JT: "When this guy had a bicycle and could go really fast like me. Remember, that mom had a bicycle."
D: A motorcycle?
JT: "Yeah. Remember in the Two? Remember we watched it? Remember you saw it. You saw it in a big screen. Maybe we should watch it again!"

JT: "I can do better than they can do. I can shoot fire bolts and ice bolts out of my hands - only when there's bad guys. I don't do it any time someone is around me who is good. But if they stay around, I think 'Maybe he is a bad guy,' and I shoot it. And I say, 'What are you doing, standing around here?' Now can we eat breakfast?"